Thursday, November 8, 2012

Kids are kids

Parenting stinks, no matter what. Disabilities or not. I have one of each, my daughter is totally normal. She really frustrates me. She's five years old though, she isn't going to think and act like an adult. There are times when I can't decide who is harder to parent. They are both SO tough.

Lately, I'm realizing that Andy's disability isn't always to blame when times are tough. He's just a kid, and he is going to have bad days and act up, just like other kids. So back to, parenting just stinks. I need more time each week, when I don't have to parent my kids. I'm finally starting to get it.

I've been able to leave my son at school, now that he knows everyone, and everyone has gotten to know him. I first started by leaving him there for the first hour alone, and noticing that he was quite happy when I returned. He was in a good mood, and hadn't been crying. We hit a turning point last week, when I would start to feed him his snack at school, he would start crying and lose it. It seemed like he was trying to tell me, "just take me home, I'm tired".

So, I asked the teacher if they could feed him snack, and see if he freaks out. They've done it twice now, and he's fine. As soon as I come back into the classroom, no matter what time, when he hears my voice he gets whiney and soon cries. If I return a little early, I stay quiet and don't let him see me until it is almost time to take him home. This is working so far.

It gives me time to run errands without kids, or go visit with people. Time that I don't have to be a parent. I do still feel like I should be there checking on Andy, but it just makes things worse. Now that I trust they are doing what I would do with him, and they know about some of his triggers, I feel better about having him there without me.

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